NO CRAFTS TONIGHT! (Akbar Dance Party! Woooo!)

NO CRAFTS TONIGHT!

CraftNight has the week off, and Akbar is here to knock your yams off! Grab yer giblets and dance ’til you drop, it’s pre-turkey cardio CRAZY tonight! We’ll see you next week, here’s a little note of thanks:

THANKS:

For our neighborhood oasis, Akbar, where no matter how you’re feeling or what you’re doing, there is always a welcome spot for you among good company in tough times and good times.

For the $4 cosmos so strong that make you feel so dense, light actually bends around you.

For Crafters bold and brazen, shy and demure, ribald and wild!

Thank you for googly eyes, pipe cleaners, glue, glitter, glitter glue, scissors and all manner of sparkly doo-dads!

Thanks for you, who are reading this, because you’ve decided to read it!

And thanks for everything ELSE I’m not putting in here, because if I don’t send it out soon, there are going to be a lot of confused crafters at Akbar! Go DANCE! Cast your fate to the wind, let LOOSE!

xoxo,

See you next week at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

November 18th, 2009 – HAND TURKEYS & Ticket Giveaway!

This Wednesday, November 18th, 2009 from 9pm until 12-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Annual Hand Turkey Jam!

$2 processing fee please

You bet your bippy it’s time for HAND TURKEYS! This is that time-honored tradition where you trace your hand, cut out the shape, and make it into a lil’ turkey and decorate it to fit your personal whim. We can’t resist, it happens every year, it makes a great gift, hangs on the refrigerator perfectly, or a co-worker’s decorative station, it brightens up one’s day and provides inspiration for all that cooking that needs to go down preceding days before Thanksgiving!

May I add, there will be NO CRAFTS NEXT WEEK, as we’re opening the dance floor for some dance fever before you stuff your gourde with yams and potatoes! So come in NOW to get your paper turkey on!

See you at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

ALSO: We’re having a DRAWING!

We’ll be giving away ONE FREE PAIR OF NOVEMBER 25th TICKETS for the West Coast premiere of Arias with a Twist, starring Joey Arias, directed and designed by Basil Twist, presented at the REDCAT in Downtown LA!

I saw this show in NY last year, and I can’t recommend it enough, it’s a BLAST, please please PLEASE go see it! You’re gonna have a great time, and you’ll want to make puppets out of all of your socks and make prank phone calls to aliens! Here’s the official site for the show!

And here’s a video excerpt!

In this deliriously madcap fantasy, of which The New York Times wrote “Goes the distance, all the way over the rainbow,” the soaring song stylings of demented diva Joey Arias are surrounded by an eye-popping theatrical extravaganza conjured by a team of puppeteers directed by the legendary Basil Twist.

REDCAT | the Roy and Edna Disney/CalArts Theater

631 W Second Street, Los Angeles, CA 90012

Nov 18-Dec 13

Wednesdays–Saturdays at 8:30pm

Sundays at 7:00pm

(Added performance Tues, Nov 24; No performance Thurs, Nov 26)

Tickets: $35-40 [Students $28-32]

213-237-2800 or REDCAT.ORG

November 11th, 2009 – Organic Mosaic Materials!

This Wednesday, November 11th, 2009 from 9pm-ish to 12-ish at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Macaroni & Bean Mosaic Madness

$2 processing fee, please…

And now, in (VERY) loose iambic pentameter, what to expect this Wednesday:

Dear Crafter, Autumn calls to you with beans
And also plethora of pasta joins our bar
The mixture of both groups is truly keen
To help you in creations most bizarre

Behold, come one and all to our CraftNight
There will be glue and glitter gobs galore
You will be furnished with materials delight
The moment you walk into Akbar’s door

Dried macaroni, rigatoni too
Black-eyed susans red beans and some rice
As you collage while working with some glue
You may get hungry say it to suffice

Don’t dilly-dally, dither or delay
Come in come in and celebrate with us
Another week of fabulous soiree
An evening winsome, charming so far thus.

See you at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Website

Akbar’s Website

One Week – TWO CraftNights! October 28th & 30th, 2009

CraftNight #1 - This Wednesday, October 28th, 2009 from 9 to midnight-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: B.Y.O.P. & Squaredancing with LIVE MUSIC from Triple Chicken Foot, and famous square-dancing caller, Cory Marie Podielski!

$2 processing fee, please!

Bring Your Own Pumpkin, I may have about 3-4 courtesy pumpkins, but don’t bank on it… and I’ll have all the necessary tools you can use to carve your squash into a decorative lantern, suitable for most doorsteps, and then even adorn it with glitter and googly eyes. That’s right, against my better judgement, I’m going to give you sharp instruments while you are surrounded by cocktails, and then encourage you to Square-dance! Eeek! Square-Dancing! Don’t freak out, Square-dancing is EASY, all the dances are taught, it’s easy and FUN and it’s a great way to meet people, if you have two left feet, you’ll just be cuter, that’s how square-dancing works. It’s a Square-volution, hop on board!

CraftNight #2 - This Friday at the HAMMER MUSEUM we’re having a Halloween Hoedown starting at 7pm!

Projects: Popsicle Stick Haunted Houses OR Cut-N-Color Paper Scarecrow Dolls!

This event is FREE!!!!

There will be live bluegrass from Joshua Tree, California’s Shadow Mountain Band. You may enter your Halloween decorations in a contest for great prizes (the categories will be obscure… for sure…) I’ll will supply everything you need to make your own creepy crafts. Plus, your hostess Darlin’ will serve up drag hospitality in gingham as you enjoy the cash bar and seasonal menu at the Café Hammer.

So come find me at one of these, it’s going to be a rollicking good time!

See you at the Craft Tables,

JP Craft Captain

PS- Thank you to my beautiful pumpkin models, Mr. Johnson and Ms. Teezer, you both look good in seasonal garb, a cornucopia for the eyes!

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

Sugar Skulls! TONIGHT! (October 21st, 2009)

TONIGHT! October 21st, 2009 from 9pm-ish to 12-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!

Project: Decorating Calaveras (SKULLS) made from SUGAR!!!

$2 per project, please

NOTE: Special CraftNight at the HAMMER MUSEUM on October 30th at 7pm!

ANOTHER NOTE: www.gothtober.com view it! Gold Lamé, Puppet Opera, 7 Sins, Recipes, Crafts and MORE!

TONIGHT: We’re making sugar skulls in the oven, they are drying, and you are invited to decorate them TONIGHT. We’re coloring them with markers and gluing jewels to them. We’re waaaay ahead of schedule on the sugar skulls, as The Day of the Dead isn’t until November 1st, but it’s good to be prepared, right?

Halloween (exciting derivative of the celtic Samhain) is about pleasing the spirits and saying “Hey spirits, thanks for all the corn and awesome harvest!” or “Hey Spirits, here’s a goat head and some burnt offerings, please don’t mess up my fields if you please” or “Hey! You crummy spirit! I’m carving this squash into a scary shape, you better stay away from me and my plants, go terrorize someone else’s homestead!” Somehow over the years, this all got turned into overpriced slutty nurse outfits and rhyming black cat greeting cards, but the weirder it gets, the more intrigued I am to observe it’s continued evolving condition.

Day of the Dead, however, is a.) Not Halloween and b.) Not satanic! (I know, I know, try not to be disappointed) Day of the Dead consists of 2 days of remembering those we love and honor who have gone into the great beyond. Day of the Dead starts the 1st of November for the baby spirits, with the adult spirits honored on November 2nd. Maybe you’re like “Aw jeez, this is really deep and depressing” but hey dude, it’s the cycle of life, what are you gonna do? It’s good to remember those we miss, take some time, think about mortality, and remember the essence of our loved ones, keep them alive in our hearts, live in a way that continues the magic they offered us when alive, and be aware of one’s spiritual connection with the natural seasons of spring to winter. Seasons, bro, come on, grasp it, we all have them.

If that’s like… getting too intense, just remember this whole thing involves SUGAR… LOTS of it. If you don’t like your creation, just eat it, and in no time at all, you’re teeth will be humming and your eye will be ticking and your knee will be bouncing and you’ll EXPLODE with a sugar bomb-freakout smile so wide, we’ll need a sandblaster to get it off your face.

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

Haunted Hot Rods! Oct. 14th, 2009

This Wednesday, October 14th, 2009 from 9pm until 12-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Haunted Paper HotRods from Gothtober.com’s DAY 10 (by artist, Lush Newton)

$2 processing fee, please

We weren’t able to make the hot rods last week, so we’re making ‘em this week! If you like coloring, this one’s for YOU! It requires a little bit of assembly, but these are real beauties, fit for a good ol’ fashioned demolition derby. Each car has been given an eerie driver: The Wolfman, Bride of Frankenstein and The Mummy!

You can supe these up any way you choose, even change the driver if you want to, get crazy, follow your own rules! These are super-duper limited edition, brand-spanking new hot off the presses, hand-drawn by Lush Newton, who lives in Humboldt, CA. She’s been making us a Halloween paper craft every year for the last SIX YEARS! She’s been DAY 10 on the Gothtober Countdown Calendar since 2004, she’s made cut-out hearses, masks of creepy creatures, ghostly taco trucks and now… the haunted hot-rods.

Come in and make one! If you’re lucky, we might have our signature home made promotional popcorn balls to give out, in honor of Gothtober and all things that go bump in the night.

See you at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain Candycorn

GOTHTOBER.COM

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

Gothtober 7th: SPOOKY FIGURINES & MASKS!

TONIGHT! Wednesday October 7th, 2009 from 9pm until midnight, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Spooky Figurines and Haunted Wooden Masks! MEGA-Variety Bonanza!

$2 processing fee, please

Hey Halloween Freaks! Are you counting down? Are you gazing at GOTHTOBER.COM? There are some very tawdry images in today’s mix. If you don’t know what the heck I’m talking about, come to CraftNight, I’ll explain the whole thing to you over popcorn balls. Yes, we made a lot of popcorn balls, yes, they are home made and delicious, the Gothtober High Priestess of Web perfected the recipe, they are unparalleled.

Figurines and Wooden Halloween masks and acrylic paint tonight, eyeballs, pumpkins, witch heads and other weird stuff! I know I said paper hotrods last week, but the vehicles are still in the shop so we’ll just have to make those next week, when artist Lush Newton is done adding dual exhaust and airbags to the Bride of Frankenstein’s ambulance. I hear the Wolfman drives a fierce V-8 get-up, whoa fuzzy daddy-oh!

Come in for Halloween Gothtober FUN!

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

September 30th – CANDY CRAFTING!

This Wednesday, September 30th, 2009 from 9pm til midnight(ish) at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: CANDY CRAFTS!!!

$2 Processing fee, please

Man oh man oh man oh man! You don’t want to miss THIS ONE!  We’re making candy jewelry with endless edible CANDY, how about that? First come first serve, you will be handed your VERY OWN CANDY BEAD STUDIO ($20 value, BIG thanks to Jakks Pacific Toys & Liz Hogan for hooking us up!) Each kit comes with a special tray full of amazing candy jewelry supplies. You can make rings, bracelets, necklaces… and then when you get hungry, you can EAT all of it!

I’m also hoping to make popcorn balls in honor of the 7th Annual GOTHTOBER Launch, happening at midnight! What is Gothtober? Dedicated to the fun and excitement of All Hallows Eve, Gothtober.com is the world’s only time-release art gallery/advent calendar counting down the days to October 31st: Halloween! The Gothtober launch kicks off the official start of Halloween Shenanigans, and CraftNight follows along in spirit with an INSANE month of crazy creepy deluxe Halloween crafts! We’ll be making Spooky Paper Fold-Out Hot Rods, painting haunted figurines, carving pumpkins, and there will be SQUARE DANCING at the end of the month!

For this Wednesday, however, my aim is to make your teeth hum with more candy than you can shake a stick at, we’re going to be seriously blinged-out with some sweeeeeet jewelry. Be prepared to pose for the paparazzi, I hear they love them some candy jewelry fashions…

UPCOMING EVENT: A special treat is coming up on October 30th for the west siders and early risers, there will be a 7pm CraftNight on October 30th at the Hammer Museum’s HAMMER HALLOWEEN HOE DOWN! And it’s FREE! You don’t even have to pay 2 bucks! More info later, but put this on your calendar, I’ve prepared 2 projects to choose from, find out what they are by coming in to see me at the museum!

See you at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain/Head Candycorn of Gothtober.com

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

September 23rd, 2009 – Particle Board Persons

This Wednesday, September 23rd, 2009 from 9-ish until midnight-ish at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Particle Board Persons

$2 processing fee, please

It’s fall, time to dork out and buy a “Autumn Pumpkin Spice” candle and think about how it’s getting cooler in other parts of the world… but not here. In fact, this Wednesday, we’re supposed to hit triple digits with the crazy heat! That’s hardly frost upon the pumpkin, but it’s just the beginning. Happy Fierce Fall, y’all, from CraftNight!

I found these trippy cut-outs of particle board people, they are flat, they are unassuming, sort of little meditative forms, prepared to accept the unexpected. Come in and decorate yours! Perhaps you want to practice your Halloween costume designs on it, or make it resemble a cornucopia of harvest vegetables, maybe make an adorable little football uniform outfit for it, or tape cloves to it, spray it with deodorant and hang it from your rear view mirror?

You don’t have to do anything with it, really, it’s a particle board person, it merely wants to be where you are.

This is one of those “sleeper crafts” don’t let the calm facade fool you , because WHAM the night gets CRAZY with ideas, and people make wild stuff! That’s right! I said WILD STUFF, the stuff of Jungian confabulation where the rivers run glossy neon purple, the willow trees do backflips, and it all means you are TALENTED! I’m completely prepared to witness  your wonderment, even if you are underwhelmed and didn’t get enough sleep.

Waltz in here, forget the dirge of your elegant fan base, escape the papparazzi and join us for an evening of casual innovation.

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

(Thank you for all awesome contributors to my MS Ride! I made my goal and then some, thanks to your generosity! Come October 3rd and 4th, I’m gonna ride like the wind, 160-miles of TOTAL SPORTS INSPIRATION!)

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

September 16th, 2009 • GRAB BAG!!!

This Wednesday, September 16th, 2009 from 9-ish to 12-ish at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: GRAB BAG!!!

$2 Processing fee, please

If you think there are no holidays in September, you’re WRONG. As a matter of fact, September is host to a whole bunch of obscure, little-known holidays, and on the 16th of September we have: National Collect Rocks Day, National Step-Family Day, Mayflower Day, Mexican Independence Day, National Working Parents Day, and National Play-Doh Day!

It’s also International Square Dancing Month, National Blueberry Popsicle Month, National Courtesy Month and Little League month. With all these incredible options for making crafts, how do we choose ONE PROJECT?!? Creativity can be messy, complicated, difficult and downright frightening for some people, this is why CraftNight exists: to take all of that away, and get back to simply using your hands and your guts.

It’s totally easy to take something simple and make it complicated… but can you take something complicated and make it fantastically simple? That’s what I’m getting at here… it’s stealth, dude, so simple, and thus, commonly overlooked.

I’m making it easy on you: GRAB BAG. What you get is what you make, distractions cleared, perplexing obstacles eradicated, it’s just you and the BAG, you and the moment, all  you have to do is show up, and give me 2 bucks.

Y’gotta show up. It might or might not happen, you might make something great, you might make something weird, but you won’t create a thing if you don’t walk in the door, that’s the truth of makin’ stuff. Oh, I’m callin’ you, crafter, make it happen, it’s almost Fall, it’s almost Rosh Hashanah, and it’s time to do yourself a favor and come have some fun.

See you at the Craft Table, and wait… read this below:

I’ve been kicking ass with Relapsing/Remitting Multiple Sclerosis since May of 2007, I’m tough and I’m strong and I’m FIFTEEN DOLLARS from making my minimum, so please pledge me in the 2009 MS Ride which will be happening October 3rd and 4th of 2009. I know it’s hard times, send 10 bucks, heck, send 5, every little bit helps. I’ll be riding 160 miles over the course of 2 days with my Team: TOTAL SPORTS INSPIRATION (That’s Team TSI to you…).

Thanks for your support,

JP Craft Captain • TSI Team Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site