One Week – TWO CraftNights! October 28th & 30th, 2009

CraftNight #1 - This Wednesday, October 28th, 2009 from 9 to midnight-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: B.Y.O.P. & Squaredancing with LIVE MUSIC from Triple Chicken Foot, and famous square-dancing caller, Cory Marie Podielski!

$2 processing fee, please!

Bring Your Own Pumpkin, I may have about 3-4 courtesy pumpkins, but don’t bank on it… and I’ll have all the necessary tools you can use to carve your squash into a decorative lantern, suitable for most doorsteps, and then even adorn it with glitter and googly eyes. That’s right, against my better judgement, I’m going to give you sharp instruments while you are surrounded by cocktails, and then encourage you to Square-dance! Eeek! Square-Dancing! Don’t freak out, Square-dancing is EASY, all the dances are taught, it’s easy and FUN and it’s a great way to meet people, if you have two left feet, you’ll just be cuter, that’s how square-dancing works. It’s a Square-volution, hop on board!

CraftNight #2 - This Friday at the HAMMER MUSEUM we’re having a Halloween Hoedown starting at 7pm!

Projects: Popsicle Stick Haunted Houses OR Cut-N-Color Paper Scarecrow Dolls!

This event is FREE!!!!

There will be live bluegrass from Joshua Tree, California’s Shadow Mountain Band. You may enter your Halloween decorations in a contest for great prizes (the categories will be obscure… for sure…) I’ll will supply everything you need to make your own creepy crafts. Plus, your hostess Darlin’ will serve up drag hospitality in gingham as you enjoy the cash bar and seasonal menu at the Café Hammer.

So come find me at one of these, it’s going to be a rollicking good time!

See you at the Craft Tables,

JP Craft Captain

PS- Thank you to my beautiful pumpkin models, Mr. Johnson and Ms. Teezer, you both look good in seasonal garb, a cornucopia for the eyes!

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

Sugar Skulls! TONIGHT! (October 21st, 2009)

TONIGHT! October 21st, 2009 from 9pm-ish to 12-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!

Project: Decorating Calaveras (SKULLS) made from SUGAR!!!

$2 per project, please

NOTE: Special CraftNight at the HAMMER MUSEUM on October 30th at 7pm!

ANOTHER NOTE: www.gothtober.com view it! Gold Lamé, Puppet Opera, 7 Sins, Recipes, Crafts and MORE!

TONIGHT: We’re making sugar skulls in the oven, they are drying, and you are invited to decorate them TONIGHT. We’re coloring them with markers and gluing jewels to them. We’re waaaay ahead of schedule on the sugar skulls, as The Day of the Dead isn’t until November 1st, but it’s good to be prepared, right?

Halloween (exciting derivative of the celtic Samhain) is about pleasing the spirits and saying “Hey spirits, thanks for all the corn and awesome harvest!” or “Hey Spirits, here’s a goat head and some burnt offerings, please don’t mess up my fields if you please” or “Hey! You crummy spirit! I’m carving this squash into a scary shape, you better stay away from me and my plants, go terrorize someone else’s homestead!” Somehow over the years, this all got turned into overpriced slutty nurse outfits and rhyming black cat greeting cards, but the weirder it gets, the more intrigued I am to observe it’s continued evolving condition.

Day of the Dead, however, is a.) Not Halloween and b.) Not satanic! (I know, I know, try not to be disappointed) Day of the Dead consists of 2 days of remembering those we love and honor who have gone into the great beyond. Day of the Dead starts the 1st of November for the baby spirits, with the adult spirits honored on November 2nd. Maybe you’re like “Aw jeez, this is really deep and depressing” but hey dude, it’s the cycle of life, what are you gonna do? It’s good to remember those we miss, take some time, think about mortality, and remember the essence of our loved ones, keep them alive in our hearts, live in a way that continues the magic they offered us when alive, and be aware of one’s spiritual connection with the natural seasons of spring to winter. Seasons, bro, come on, grasp it, we all have them.

If that’s like… getting too intense, just remember this whole thing involves SUGAR… LOTS of it. If you don’t like your creation, just eat it, and in no time at all, you’re teeth will be humming and your eye will be ticking and your knee will be bouncing and you’ll EXPLODE with a sugar bomb-freakout smile so wide, we’ll need a sandblaster to get it off your face.

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

Haunted Hot Rods! Oct. 14th, 2009

This Wednesday, October 14th, 2009 from 9pm until 12-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Haunted Paper HotRods from Gothtober.com’s DAY 10 (by artist, Lush Newton)

$2 processing fee, please

We weren’t able to make the hot rods last week, so we’re making ‘em this week! If you like coloring, this one’s for YOU! It requires a little bit of assembly, but these are real beauties, fit for a good ol’ fashioned demolition derby. Each car has been given an eerie driver: The Wolfman, Bride of Frankenstein and The Mummy!

You can supe these up any way you choose, even change the driver if you want to, get crazy, follow your own rules! These are super-duper limited edition, brand-spanking new hot off the presses, hand-drawn by Lush Newton, who lives in Humboldt, CA. She’s been making us a Halloween paper craft every year for the last SIX YEARS! She’s been DAY 10 on the Gothtober Countdown Calendar since 2004, she’s made cut-out hearses, masks of creepy creatures, ghostly taco trucks and now… the haunted hot-rods.

Come in and make one! If you’re lucky, we might have our signature home made promotional popcorn balls to give out, in honor of Gothtober and all things that go bump in the night.

See you at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain Candycorn

GOTHTOBER.COM

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

Gothtober 7th: SPOOKY FIGURINES & MASKS!

TONIGHT! Wednesday October 7th, 2009 from 9pm until midnight, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Spooky Figurines and Haunted Wooden Masks! MEGA-Variety Bonanza!

$2 processing fee, please

Hey Halloween Freaks! Are you counting down? Are you gazing at GOTHTOBER.COM? There are some very tawdry images in today’s mix. If you don’t know what the heck I’m talking about, come to CraftNight, I’ll explain the whole thing to you over popcorn balls. Yes, we made a lot of popcorn balls, yes, they are home made and delicious, the Gothtober High Priestess of Web perfected the recipe, they are unparalleled.

Figurines and Wooden Halloween masks and acrylic paint tonight, eyeballs, pumpkins, witch heads and other weird stuff! I know I said paper hotrods last week, but the vehicles are still in the shop so we’ll just have to make those next week, when artist Lush Newton is done adding dual exhaust and airbags to the Bride of Frankenstein’s ambulance. I hear the Wolfman drives a fierce V-8 get-up, whoa fuzzy daddy-oh!

Come in for Halloween Gothtober FUN!

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

September 30th – CANDY CRAFTING!

This Wednesday, September 30th, 2009 from 9pm til midnight(ish) at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: CANDY CRAFTS!!!

$2 Processing fee, please

Man oh man oh man oh man! You don’t want to miss THIS ONE!  We’re making candy jewelry with endless edible CANDY, how about that? First come first serve, you will be handed your VERY OWN CANDY BEAD STUDIO ($20 value, BIG thanks to Jakks Pacific Toys & Liz Hogan for hooking us up!) Each kit comes with a special tray full of amazing candy jewelry supplies. You can make rings, bracelets, necklaces… and then when you get hungry, you can EAT all of it!

I’m also hoping to make popcorn balls in honor of the 7th Annual GOTHTOBER Launch, happening at midnight! What is Gothtober? Dedicated to the fun and excitement of All Hallows Eve, Gothtober.com is the world’s only time-release art gallery/advent calendar counting down the days to October 31st: Halloween! The Gothtober launch kicks off the official start of Halloween Shenanigans, and CraftNight follows along in spirit with an INSANE month of crazy creepy deluxe Halloween crafts! We’ll be making Spooky Paper Fold-Out Hot Rods, painting haunted figurines, carving pumpkins, and there will be SQUARE DANCING at the end of the month!

For this Wednesday, however, my aim is to make your teeth hum with more candy than you can shake a stick at, we’re going to be seriously blinged-out with some sweeeeeet jewelry. Be prepared to pose for the paparazzi, I hear they love them some candy jewelry fashions…

UPCOMING EVENT: A special treat is coming up on October 30th for the west siders and early risers, there will be a 7pm CraftNight on October 30th at the Hammer Museum’s HAMMER HALLOWEEN HOE DOWN! And it’s FREE! You don’t even have to pay 2 bucks! More info later, but put this on your calendar, I’ve prepared 2 projects to choose from, find out what they are by coming in to see me at the museum!

See you at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain/Head Candycorn of Gothtober.com

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

September 23rd, 2009 – Particle Board Persons

This Wednesday, September 23rd, 2009 from 9-ish until midnight-ish at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Particle Board Persons

$2 processing fee, please

It’s fall, time to dork out and buy a “Autumn Pumpkin Spice” candle and think about how it’s getting cooler in other parts of the world… but not here. In fact, this Wednesday, we’re supposed to hit triple digits with the crazy heat! That’s hardly frost upon the pumpkin, but it’s just the beginning. Happy Fierce Fall, y’all, from CraftNight!

I found these trippy cut-outs of particle board people, they are flat, they are unassuming, sort of little meditative forms, prepared to accept the unexpected. Come in and decorate yours! Perhaps you want to practice your Halloween costume designs on it, or make it resemble a cornucopia of harvest vegetables, maybe make an adorable little football uniform outfit for it, or tape cloves to it, spray it with deodorant and hang it from your rear view mirror?

You don’t have to do anything with it, really, it’s a particle board person, it merely wants to be where you are.

This is one of those “sleeper crafts” don’t let the calm facade fool you , because WHAM the night gets CRAZY with ideas, and people make wild stuff! That’s right! I said WILD STUFF, the stuff of Jungian confabulation where the rivers run glossy neon purple, the willow trees do backflips, and it all means you are TALENTED! I’m completely prepared to witness  your wonderment, even if you are underwhelmed and didn’t get enough sleep.

Waltz in here, forget the dirge of your elegant fan base, escape the papparazzi and join us for an evening of casual innovation.

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

(Thank you for all awesome contributors to my MS Ride! I made my goal and then some, thanks to your generosity! Come October 3rd and 4th, I’m gonna ride like the wind, 160-miles of TOTAL SPORTS INSPIRATION!)

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

September 16th, 2009 • GRAB BAG!!!

This Wednesday, September 16th, 2009 from 9-ish to 12-ish at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: GRAB BAG!!!

$2 Processing fee, please

If you think there are no holidays in September, you’re WRONG. As a matter of fact, September is host to a whole bunch of obscure, little-known holidays, and on the 16th of September we have: National Collect Rocks Day, National Step-Family Day, Mayflower Day, Mexican Independence Day, National Working Parents Day, and National Play-Doh Day!

It’s also International Square Dancing Month, National Blueberry Popsicle Month, National Courtesy Month and Little League month. With all these incredible options for making crafts, how do we choose ONE PROJECT?!? Creativity can be messy, complicated, difficult and downright frightening for some people, this is why CraftNight exists: to take all of that away, and get back to simply using your hands and your guts.

It’s totally easy to take something simple and make it complicated… but can you take something complicated and make it fantastically simple? That’s what I’m getting at here… it’s stealth, dude, so simple, and thus, commonly overlooked.

I’m making it easy on you: GRAB BAG. What you get is what you make, distractions cleared, perplexing obstacles eradicated, it’s just you and the BAG, you and the moment, all  you have to do is show up, and give me 2 bucks.

Y’gotta show up. It might or might not happen, you might make something great, you might make something weird, but you won’t create a thing if you don’t walk in the door, that’s the truth of makin’ stuff. Oh, I’m callin’ you, crafter, make it happen, it’s almost Fall, it’s almost Rosh Hashanah, and it’s time to do yourself a favor and come have some fun.

See you at the Craft Table, and wait… read this below:

I’ve been kicking ass with Relapsing/Remitting Multiple Sclerosis since May of 2007, I’m tough and I’m strong and I’m FIFTEEN DOLLARS from making my minimum, so please pledge me in the 2009 MS Ride which will be happening October 3rd and 4th of 2009. I know it’s hard times, send 10 bucks, heck, send 5, every little bit helps. I’ll be riding 160 miles over the course of 2 days with my Team: TOTAL SPORTS INSPIRATION (That’s Team TSI to you…).

Thanks for your support,

JP Craft Captain • TSI Team Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

September 9th, 2009 • Wooden Concepts

This Wednesday, September 9th, 2009 from 9-ish to midnight (or so) at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Wooden Concepts!

$2 processing fee, please!

You should know by now, there is no “sort of” jumping out of a plane if you’re going to parachute. There’s no “kind of” when you tear open the factory-sealed bag of fancy potato chips and there’s no “almost” when it comes to painting wooden concepts at CraftNight. If you’re the kind of person who spends half an hour with the dinner menu in a restaurant, or deliberates 50 times over which brand of kitchen sponge in the store is really going to do the best job, or if you have a little bit of a freak-out over what direction the toilet paper needs to flip on the roll (over or under) in the bathroom… beware of the variety offered you at CraftNight tonight. You might have a meltdown.

Wooden shapes, wooden creatures, wooden objects, some of them doubling as frames, some of them stand-alone, WHICH ONE WILL YOU CHOOSE?!? Princess, pony, snail or pirate?!? You’re going to have to COMMIT. I know it’s hard, but I promise you, whichever one you choose is the right one, really… it is. And it’s also going to be the best one. Time to take a stance, take matters into your own hands, and decide. There is great freedom in determination, feel the rush! Try it! Whoosh!

Also, here begins my invitation asking you to please pledge me in the 2009 MS Ride which will be happening October 3rd and 4th of 2009. I know it’s hard times, send 10 bucks, heck, send 5, every little bit helps. I’ve got to raise $350, as I’ve raised 100 so far, and I’ll be riding 160 miles over the course of 2 days with my Team: TOTAL SPORTS INSPIRATION (That’s Team TSI to you…).

Thanks buckets and bushels and cubits for your support!

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain • TSI Team Captain

MS Bike Rider • Kicking Ass with Relapsing/Remitting Multiple Sclerosis since May of 2007

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

September 2nd, 2009 • Personal Paint-by-Numbers

This Wednesday, September 2nd, 2009 from 9-ish to 12am-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Personal Paint-by-Numbers

$2 processing fee, please

The air smells like smoked ham, we have acquired a change in the appearance of the surface of our fine city, and other cities besides. Things are just pretty darn squirrely now, aren’t they? This week, due to the sheer incomprehensibility of recent horrific fiery events, CraftNight offers up tiny individual personal paint-by-number paintings for the treatment and cure of Crafters’ Neurasthenia.

The now ensconced cumulonimbus miasma may have your mind feeling a little muddled, which is perfectly understandable. If you are feeling lost, restless, shiftless, if you find yourself wishing that life would finally start for you, if you feel anxious about your life, positive there is something else you’re supposed to be doing, but you don’t know what it is… don’t let the crazy smoke cloud consume you, let CraftNight help.

If you can navigate through the shadowy pink patina that has settled over our neighborhood, let CraftNight gently guide you to the here and now, to a serene spot at the craft table where you can take a small step and just BE the paint for one enchanted night. Let all the crud fall away, make the simple and wise decision to give yourself the time to have some fun with no grandiose presumptions or routines. Paradise is not out of reach, it is right here.

Personal Paint-by-Numbers, of things like friendly aliens, kitties, underwater ocean scenes, are here for the taking. It’s for you, and no one else. This time, it’s personal. Personal paintings, personal time, like bendy straws and toilet paper, meant for one person at a time, personal.

See you at the Craft Table!
JP Craft Captain
CraftNight’s Site
Akbar’s Site

PS – My MOM is doing the MS Ride in a week or so, pledge her if you can, every little bit helps, she’s a powerhouse, I’m proud of you Mom! WOOO!

My amazing Mom (Chris Parr-Feldman) and my super awesome stepdad (Papa Rick) say:

Rick and I have registered for Bike MS: Waves to Wine Ride 2009 and I am asking you to join us by making a contribution to our Bike MS fundraising. We are riding with the Rotary Chain Gang and we will ride on Sunday, September 13, 2009.  It’s a 50+ mile ride starting in Rohnert Park and ending at Lake Sonoma.  Yikes! We must be crazy, but it’s for a good cause. Please think of us that day.  We appreciate it.
Last year with your help and others, Rick and I raised $3,200, and all together, the Rotary chain Gang raised $10,000! We hope you will support us again this year.

Chris Parr-Feldman and Rick Feldman

Note: If you can’t send a donation now, your Craft Captain will be bugging you in a couple weeks, because I’m doing the Southern California MS Ride in October!

August 26th, 2009 • Black Velvet Underground

TONIGHT! Wednesday, August 26th, 2009 from 9pm ’til 12-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: Lil’ black velvet postcard thingers
$2 processing fee, please

Oh JEEZ, what is that gargantuan INTENSE cloud that is NOT a cloud out there in the sky?!? It’s smoke from the Morris Fire, Azusa is ablaze! Flame lengths in excess of 30 feet, fire whirls with rapid rates of spread, September is almost HERE, and the fires are here to prove it. Are you brave enough to take a decongestant and visit me here at CraftNight?
Oh, I hope so.
It’s a coloring craft, black velvet vignettes, smaller than a postcard, petite and sweet, makes a perfect gift for a loved one OR an enemy!
You can make your own frame for it, festoon it with sparkly what-nots and sip a cool and refreshing $4 cosmo, our weekly drink special at Akbar.
And I’ll say it right here, right now: Bring a little sweater so that you don’t freeze your butt off at CraftNight, because I will have the air ON so that we can all breathe together in harmony. So you might be chilly, but you’re respiratory tract will thank me.
See you at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain

One more thing: CraftNight salutes Ted Kennedy, who was called into the great beyond today. Thank you for all your years of hard work, sir, you earned the nickname “The Democrat Republicans Love to Hate” quite well.

CraftNight’s Website
Akbar’s Website