Ye Olde Crafte Nighte Crafte Faire!!! (Last CraftNight of 2009)

This Wednesday, December 16th, 2009 from 9pm until 12-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Ornaments

$2 processing fee, please!

We’re having our annual Ye Olde CraftNighte Craft Faire, where you can support some of your favorite local artists and makers of awesome things, and select unique items for the season. Come in and get some cool stuff! This is also the LAST CraftNight of 2009, so if anything, just pop in to say hello before our double zeros are done and 2010 begins.

It is the holiday season, many of you are dashing from party to party, eating lots of exotic and dynamic appetizers, making enough small talk to form an advanced masters degree in peppy quotidian frivolity. Last but not least, some of you will be fabricating love tokens for those close to you. It is here that I will share the most important craft knowledge I have, in order to help you save energy and give yourself the gift of sanity this year. Are you ready? When all else fails and the stress and pressure of social-function-family-freakout crawls into your cerebral cortex, here’s how to fight the doubt and cold sweats:

Step 1 - Add macaroni

Step 2 - Spray paint gold

Step 3 - Roll in glitter

You cannot go wrong with this holiday formula, it is fool-proof. It seems too simple to be true, but trust me. This advanced schematic has everything to do with finding the lost paradise within and offering for someone a spirited home made creation that is part of the heart, not WalMart.

See you at the Craft Table! And if not, see you next YEAR!

JP Craft Captain (who wrote/directed/is starring in a puppet show you should see this weekend…)

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

PUPPET SHOW!!! NO CraftNight this Wednesday!!!

There will be no CraftNight this week, as I’m preparing for the upcoming

SPARKLY WINTER CHRISTMAS HOLIDAY HANUKKAH NOGSTYLE CHRISTMAS SHOW!!!

I know I know! I thought about having a substitute, but I’m being super selfish because I want you all to myself next week for making ornaments, it’s just too fun. We’ll  be back next week, but please come see my show that I’ve produced and procured for the holiday season.

Get tickets HERE

Find out about our lovely venue, the Velaslavasay Panorama, HERE.

And now for our exciting show description:

Take advantage of festive holiday value and attend The Sparkly Winter Christmas Holiday Hanukkah Nogstyle Christmas Show! This spirited spectacle will bring immediate pleasure and years of fond memories to all!

This all ages show is a fast-paced, high-intensity, heart-warming experience involving two messiahs, corny jokes, glitter, spontaneous songs, live music, puppets, eggnog, goldfish crackers and who knows what the heck else, don’t say we didn’t warn you!

Written and directed by Moira MacDonald and Julianna (JP) Parr and performed by a motley crew of notorious ne’re-do-wells, the adventure begins with the Los Angeles DASH bus and concludes with a stupendous cataclysmic show-stopping seasonal scenario that defies all reasoning. We really think you should see it.

Friday, December 11 – 8  pm
Saturday, December 12 – 8 pm & 10 pm
Sunday, December 13 – 7 pm

Friday, December 18 – 8 pm & 10 pm
Saturday, December 19 – 8 pm & 10 pm
Sunday, December 20 – 7 pm
-at-
THE VELASLAVASAY PANORAMA
1122 WEST 24TH STREET
Los Angeles, California 90007
(213) 746-2166

See you next week at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain

Craftnight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

December 2nd, 2009 • Holiday Origami!

This Wednesday December 2nd, 2009 from 9pm till midnight at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Crazy Holiday Origami

$2 processing fee, please!

ALSO: Ticket GIVEAWAY for “Arias with a Twist” at the RedCat! Even if you don’t win a ticket, you should go buy one, if you like drag, puppets and fiery creatures… that’s only three reasons of zillions for why you need to check it out. See this post for my previous write-up about this fabulous show!

ALSO: The “YE OLDE CRAFTNIGHTE HOLIDAY FAIRE” is coming up! Contact me if you want to sell, and for you buyers out there, get ready! December 16th! The last CraftNight of 2009!!!

Because of the very wonderful generosity of the  Keri & Joshua Esguia Origami Library Preservation Society, we’ll be folding exquisite holiday selections from “Christmas Origami Volumes 1-4″ as well as non-holiday selections from “Origami Volumes 2 – 8.” Origami, or “The Kama Sutra of paper folding” involves making representations of objects OR actual objects without ANY gluing or cutting! Obviously we love glue and scissors a little too much at CraftNight to banish them from even a SINGLE Wednesday night, and rules were meant to be broken. You’re welcome to go holiday or non-holiday, and you’re welcome to glue and cut or not glue and cut: build your own zen! (Gawd, that sounds rilly cheezy, bear with me) You might come up with some crazy maniacal diabolical incredible paper creation that astounds and beguiles even the most staunch origami traditionalist! Come in and explore!

See you at the Craft Table! Eeeeee!

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

NO CRAFTS TONIGHT! (Akbar Dance Party! Woooo!)

NO CRAFTS TONIGHT!

CraftNight has the week off, and Akbar is here to knock your yams off! Grab yer giblets and dance ’til you drop, it’s pre-turkey cardio CRAZY tonight! We’ll see you next week, here’s a little note of thanks:

THANKS:

For our neighborhood oasis, Akbar, where no matter how you’re feeling or what you’re doing, there is always a welcome spot for you among good company in tough times and good times.

For the $4 cosmos so strong that make you feel so dense, light actually bends around you.

For Crafters bold and brazen, shy and demure, ribald and wild!

Thank you for googly eyes, pipe cleaners, glue, glitter, glitter glue, scissors and all manner of sparkly doo-dads!

Thanks for you, who are reading this, because you’ve decided to read it!

And thanks for everything ELSE I’m not putting in here, because if I don’t send it out soon, there are going to be a lot of confused crafters at Akbar! Go DANCE! Cast your fate to the wind, let LOOSE!

xoxo,

See you next week at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

November 18th, 2009 – HAND TURKEYS & Ticket Giveaway!

This Wednesday, November 18th, 2009 from 9pm until 12-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Annual Hand Turkey Jam!

$2 processing fee please

You bet your bippy it’s time for HAND TURKEYS! This is that time-honored tradition where you trace your hand, cut out the shape, and make it into a lil’ turkey and decorate it to fit your personal whim. We can’t resist, it happens every year, it makes a great gift, hangs on the refrigerator perfectly, or a co-worker’s decorative station, it brightens up one’s day and provides inspiration for all that cooking that needs to go down preceding days before Thanksgiving!

May I add, there will be NO CRAFTS NEXT WEEK, as we’re opening the dance floor for some dance fever before you stuff your gourde with yams and potatoes! So come in NOW to get your paper turkey on!

See you at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

ALSO: We’re having a DRAWING!

We’ll be giving away ONE FREE PAIR OF NOVEMBER 25th TICKETS for the West Coast premiere of Arias with a Twist, starring Joey Arias, directed and designed by Basil Twist, presented at the REDCAT in Downtown LA!

I saw this show in NY last year, and I can’t recommend it enough, it’s a BLAST, please please PLEASE go see it! You’re gonna have a great time, and you’ll want to make puppets out of all of your socks and make prank phone calls to aliens! Here’s the official site for the show!

And here’s a video excerpt!

In this deliriously madcap fantasy, of which The New York Times wrote “Goes the distance, all the way over the rainbow,” the soaring song stylings of demented diva Joey Arias are surrounded by an eye-popping theatrical extravaganza conjured by a team of puppeteers directed by the legendary Basil Twist.

REDCAT | the Roy and Edna Disney/CalArts Theater

631 W Second Street, Los Angeles, CA 90012

Nov 18-Dec 13

Wednesdays–Saturdays at 8:30pm

Sundays at 7:00pm

(Added performance Tues, Nov 24; No performance Thurs, Nov 26)

Tickets: $35-40 [Students $28-32]

213-237-2800 or REDCAT.ORG

November 11th, 2009 – Organic Mosaic Materials!

This Wednesday, November 11th, 2009 from 9pm-ish to 12-ish at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Macaroni & Bean Mosaic Madness

$2 processing fee, please…

And now, in (VERY) loose iambic pentameter, what to expect this Wednesday:

Dear Crafter, Autumn calls to you with beans
And also plethora of pasta joins our bar
The mixture of both groups is truly keen
To help you in creations most bizarre

Behold, come one and all to our CraftNight
There will be glue and glitter gobs galore
You will be furnished with materials delight
The moment you walk into Akbar’s door

Dried macaroni, rigatoni too
Black-eyed susans red beans and some rice
As you collage while working with some glue
You may get hungry say it to suffice

Don’t dilly-dally, dither or delay
Come in come in and celebrate with us
Another week of fabulous soiree
An evening winsome, charming so far thus.

See you at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Website

Akbar’s Website

One Week – TWO CraftNights! October 28th & 30th, 2009

CraftNight #1 - This Wednesday, October 28th, 2009 from 9 to midnight-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: B.Y.O.P. & Squaredancing with LIVE MUSIC from Triple Chicken Foot, and famous square-dancing caller, Cory Marie Podielski!

$2 processing fee, please!

Bring Your Own Pumpkin, I may have about 3-4 courtesy pumpkins, but don’t bank on it… and I’ll have all the necessary tools you can use to carve your squash into a decorative lantern, suitable for most doorsteps, and then even adorn it with glitter and googly eyes. That’s right, against my better judgement, I’m going to give you sharp instruments while you are surrounded by cocktails, and then encourage you to Square-dance! Eeek! Square-Dancing! Don’t freak out, Square-dancing is EASY, all the dances are taught, it’s easy and FUN and it’s a great way to meet people, if you have two left feet, you’ll just be cuter, that’s how square-dancing works. It’s a Square-volution, hop on board!

CraftNight #2 - This Friday at the HAMMER MUSEUM we’re having a Halloween Hoedown starting at 7pm!

Projects: Popsicle Stick Haunted Houses OR Cut-N-Color Paper Scarecrow Dolls!

This event is FREE!!!!

There will be live bluegrass from Joshua Tree, California’s Shadow Mountain Band. You may enter your Halloween decorations in a contest for great prizes (the categories will be obscure… for sure…) I’ll will supply everything you need to make your own creepy crafts. Plus, your hostess Darlin’ will serve up drag hospitality in gingham as you enjoy the cash bar and seasonal menu at the Café Hammer.

So come find me at one of these, it’s going to be a rollicking good time!

See you at the Craft Tables,

JP Craft Captain

PS- Thank you to my beautiful pumpkin models, Mr. Johnson and Ms. Teezer, you both look good in seasonal garb, a cornucopia for the eyes!

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

Sugar Skulls! TONIGHT! (October 21st, 2009)

TONIGHT! October 21st, 2009 from 9pm-ish to 12-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!

Project: Decorating Calaveras (SKULLS) made from SUGAR!!!

$2 per project, please

NOTE: Special CraftNight at the HAMMER MUSEUM on October 30th at 7pm!

ANOTHER NOTE: www.gothtober.com view it! Gold Lamé, Puppet Opera, 7 Sins, Recipes, Crafts and MORE!

TONIGHT: We’re making sugar skulls in the oven, they are drying, and you are invited to decorate them TONIGHT. We’re coloring them with markers and gluing jewels to them. We’re waaaay ahead of schedule on the sugar skulls, as The Day of the Dead isn’t until November 1st, but it’s good to be prepared, right?

Halloween (exciting derivative of the celtic Samhain) is about pleasing the spirits and saying “Hey spirits, thanks for all the corn and awesome harvest!” or “Hey Spirits, here’s a goat head and some burnt offerings, please don’t mess up my fields if you please” or “Hey! You crummy spirit! I’m carving this squash into a scary shape, you better stay away from me and my plants, go terrorize someone else’s homestead!” Somehow over the years, this all got turned into overpriced slutty nurse outfits and rhyming black cat greeting cards, but the weirder it gets, the more intrigued I am to observe it’s continued evolving condition.

Day of the Dead, however, is a.) Not Halloween and b.) Not satanic! (I know, I know, try not to be disappointed) Day of the Dead consists of 2 days of remembering those we love and honor who have gone into the great beyond. Day of the Dead starts the 1st of November for the baby spirits, with the adult spirits honored on November 2nd. Maybe you’re like “Aw jeez, this is really deep and depressing” but hey dude, it’s the cycle of life, what are you gonna do? It’s good to remember those we miss, take some time, think about mortality, and remember the essence of our loved ones, keep them alive in our hearts, live in a way that continues the magic they offered us when alive, and be aware of one’s spiritual connection with the natural seasons of spring to winter. Seasons, bro, come on, grasp it, we all have them.

If that’s like… getting too intense, just remember this whole thing involves SUGAR… LOTS of it. If you don’t like your creation, just eat it, and in no time at all, you’re teeth will be humming and your eye will be ticking and your knee will be bouncing and you’ll EXPLODE with a sugar bomb-freakout smile so wide, we’ll need a sandblaster to get it off your face.

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

Haunted Hot Rods! Oct. 14th, 2009

This Wednesday, October 14th, 2009 from 9pm until 12-ish, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Haunted Paper HotRods from Gothtober.com’s DAY 10 (by artist, Lush Newton)

$2 processing fee, please

We weren’t able to make the hot rods last week, so we’re making ‘em this week! If you like coloring, this one’s for YOU! It requires a little bit of assembly, but these are real beauties, fit for a good ol’ fashioned demolition derby. Each car has been given an eerie driver: The Wolfman, Bride of Frankenstein and The Mummy!

You can supe these up any way you choose, even change the driver if you want to, get crazy, follow your own rules! These are super-duper limited edition, brand-spanking new hot off the presses, hand-drawn by Lush Newton, who lives in Humboldt, CA. She’s been making us a Halloween paper craft every year for the last SIX YEARS! She’s been DAY 10 on the Gothtober Countdown Calendar since 2004, she’s made cut-out hearses, masks of creepy creatures, ghostly taco trucks and now… the haunted hot-rods.

Come in and make one! If you’re lucky, we might have our signature home made promotional popcorn balls to give out, in honor of Gothtober and all things that go bump in the night.

See you at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain Candycorn

GOTHTOBER.COM

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site

Gothtober 7th: SPOOKY FIGURINES & MASKS!

TONIGHT! Wednesday October 7th, 2009 from 9pm until midnight, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!

Project: Spooky Figurines and Haunted Wooden Masks! MEGA-Variety Bonanza!

$2 processing fee, please

Hey Halloween Freaks! Are you counting down? Are you gazing at GOTHTOBER.COM? There are some very tawdry images in today’s mix. If you don’t know what the heck I’m talking about, come to CraftNight, I’ll explain the whole thing to you over popcorn balls. Yes, we made a lot of popcorn balls, yes, they are home made and delicious, the Gothtober High Priestess of Web perfected the recipe, they are unparalleled.

Figurines and Wooden Halloween masks and acrylic paint tonight, eyeballs, pumpkins, witch heads and other weird stuff! I know I said paper hotrods last week, but the vehicles are still in the shop so we’ll just have to make those next week, when artist Lush Newton is done adding dual exhaust and airbags to the Bride of Frankenstein’s ambulance. I hear the Wolfman drives a fierce V-8 get-up, whoa fuzzy daddy-oh!

Come in for Halloween Gothtober FUN!

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

CraftNight’s Site

Akbar’s Site